Chapter 431 (1): An Accountant has Come to the Island

After Gu Can turned down Chen Ping'an's offer to return the fist technique manual, his mother lowered her head, and her entire body was trembling, but it was unclear whether it was from anger or sorrow.

Chen Ping'an gently set down his chopsticks, then called out, "Gu Can."

"I'm here!" Gu Can immediately replied loudly as he wiped away his tears.

"I will beat you, I will scold you, I will lecture you on the principles that I believe to be right, even if you don't agree with them at all. I'll do all of that, but I won't abandon you or leave you to your own devices," Chen Ping'an said, and his voice wasn't very loud, but there was an air of determination to it, as if he were speaking to both Gu Can and himself. "If I leave someday, then that must mean that I was able to get over the hurdle in my heart. If I'm unable to get over it, then I'll continue to stay here on Cyan Gorge Island."

"I believe you! You've never lied to me before!" Gu Can said as a bright smile broke through his tears.

"I might have to break that rule today," Chen Ping'an suddenly said, and Gu Can's entire body immediately tensed as his heart leaped to the base of his throat.

"On the way here, I said that I would only listen to you speak at the table, and I won't speak any further. However, now that I've had something to eat, I've regained some energy, so I feel like talking again. As usual, I'll speak, and you'll listen. Once I'm done, it'll be my turn to listen if you wish to speak. Regardless of who it is that's speaking, the one who listens must do so with respect and only interject when absolutely necessary," Chen Ping'an said.

A bright smile appeared on Gu Can's face, and he scratched his own head as he asked, "Can I return to the table? I still haven't eaten yet."

Chen Ping'an nodded in response.

"Your body is still growing, so make sure to eat lots."

Gu Can wiped a hand over his face, then made his way back to his original spot at the table before moving his chair a little closer to Chen Ping'an's. He was terrified that Chen Ping'an would go back on his word and suddenly decide to leave Cyan Gorge Island. If that were to happen, then he would be able to intercept Chen Ping'an in a more timely fashion by sitting closer to him.

After that, Gu Can rushed away to fill a bowl of rice for himself, then sat down and began shoveling it down his own mouth. He had always liked to copy Chen Ping'an, imitating the way that he ate and the way that he clasped his hands together in his sleeves.

Neither of them had any friends outside of each other back in the small town, and during winter, they always liked to huddle together with their hands clasped together within their sleeves, particularly after they had just built a snowman.

They would shiver together with their hands tucked up their sleeves, then burst into laughter as they made fun of each other. When it came to delivering insults, Gu Can had always been far more proficient than Chen Ping'an, so Gu Can always came out on top in their wars of words.

Chen Ping'an took a glance at Gu Can, then turned to his mother as he asked, "Auntie, if another child comes to linger outside your door today, would you still open the door for him and give him a bowl of rice? Would you still intentionally tell him that the rice wasn't free, and that he would have to compensate you by selling medicinal herbs?"

The woman carefully pondered the question, but before she had a chance to reply, Chen Ping'an mused to himself, "I don't think you would. Of course, I don't think that's wrong of you. Setting aside the current environment of Bamboo Scroll Lake, even if you hadn't done that all those years ago, I still wouldn't think that you had done anything wrong.

“Hence, I'm never going to forget that bowl of rice that you gave me for the rest of my life. It also put my heart at ease that you asked for compensation for the bowl of rice. Before she passed, my mother told me to never resort to begging, so the fact that I had to pay you back for the bowl of rice meant that I didn't have to disappoint my mother in the afterlife."

The woman turned away to wipe some tears from her eyes.

Chen Ping'an's voice remained calm and placid as he continued, "But have you considered this? Without that bowl of rice, I would've never given that catfish to your son, and you may still be living on Clay Vase Alley right now, leading a very impoverished and difficult life.

“Hence, we have to believe in karma, that doing good deeds will beget good karma, and vice versa. At the same time, when our lives take a turn for the better, we can't only believe in good deeds leading to good karma and forget that bad deeds will also result in bad karma. Do you think what I'm saying is correct?"

The woman continued to shed tears in silence, neither agreeing with nor denying Chen Ping'an's statement.

She was afraid that regardless of what she said, it would have a negative impact on her son's future, so she would rather not say anything.

Chen Ping'an was aware of this, so even though Gu Can had revealed to him the decision that the woman had made on that catfish back then, he still didn't feel any resentment toward her.

Gratitude was something that one should carry for an entire lifetime.

Regardless of what happened thereafter, nothing could erase that initial act of kindness. It was just like the streets and alleys of the small town. No matter how thick a layer of snow accumulated during winter, once spring arrived and the snow melted away, all of those familiar streets and alleys would be revealed once again.

The only difference was that after embarking on such a long journey, Chen Ping'an had learned not to force his own principles upon others, and that was why he had been willing to listen to everything that Gu Can had to say in order to understand his thoughts and feelings.

Chen Ping'an forced a smile onto his own face as he continued, "Don't worry, Auntie, I won't force Gu Can to be like me. It's not necessary, and it's also beyond the realm of my capabilities. I just want to try and see if I can do some things that both Gu Can and I feel are correct. I may be staying here, but I won't hinder Gu Can from protecting you, and I certainly won't ask you to give up your current life of wealth and comfort. Is that alright?"

The woman was hesitant for a long while before ultimately giving a difficult nod.

Chen Ping'an remained seated, and he didn't reach for the flagon of crow caw wine on the table, nor did he remove his Sword Nurturing Gourd from his own waist.

After a brief silence, he continued, "I have a piece of good news for you and Gu Can. Uncle Gu may be dead, but he's not actually dead. He's still in this world because he became a yin entity, and that's ultimately a good thing. I came here to Bamboo Scroll Lake because he took a massive risk to come and tell me that things aren't going to go as smoothly for the two of you here as they appear on the surface.

“I came here because I don't want Gu Can's actions to erase the chances of a reunion between the three of you someday. My parents always said that Uncle Gu was the most fitting husband for you out of all of the men in the nearby alleys. He was a good man, someone who was capable of writing out beautiful couplets, someone who was more like a scholar than a farmer, and I don't want a good man like him to be sad."

The woman clasped a hand over her own mouth as the tears broke through the floodgates.

These were the most genuine tears that she had shed thus far, and they had nothing to do with right or wrong.

"You, Gu Can, and I have all suffered immensely in the past at the hands of unreasonable individuals, and none of us were born into privileged situations where we didn't have to worry about food and shelter. We were not people who could've chosen to be civilized and educated just because we wanted to.

“I'm sure you and I have both had moments in our lives when it almost became too difficult to continue living. You overcame those moments for Gu Can's sake, while I lived on for the memory of my late parents. Both of us had to grit our teeth and muster up every last ounce of our willpower to persevere through those moments, so we understand hardship better than most other people.

“Even though Gu Can is the youngest of the three of us, he has experienced the most hardship out of all of us since leaving Clay Vase Alley. Even at such a young age, he's having to lead an even more difficult life than me and you, because no matter how impoverished we were, no matter how arduous our lives became, we never had to worry about death every single day like Gu Can is right now.

“However, that doesn't take away our right to ask 'why' during the most difficult moments of our lives. But no one will come to tell us why, so eventually, once we've endured enough hardships, we eventually become desensitized and stop asking why. It's not like there's any point in considering such questions anyway.

“When we're fighting just to survive, thinking about anything feels wrong. We are wrong, everyone else is wrong, this world is wrong. This world has beaten me down, so why can't I retaliate. It seems like everyone who lives through tough times like those end up becoming unreasonable people.

“They become unwilling to hear others explain to them why because they no longer care about the answer. They always feel like as soon as they let their hard and unyielding facade slip for even a single moment, then everything that they've fought so hard for will be taken away, and that they'll be disregarding all of the painful lessons that their hardships have taught them.

“Why do the teachers at school favor the children from wealthy families? Why do my parents have to be looked down on by my neighbors? Why is it that my peers are able to afford paper kites, while I can only watch enviously as the kites are flown? Why is it that I have to work myself to the bone in the fields, while so many other people are able to live lives of comfort and leisure and look down on me whenever we cross paths?

“Why is it that some people are born with everything that we worked so hard for, yet they don't even know to appreciate it? Why is it that all of the other households are able to enjoy reunions on the Moon Festival every year? I don't know why things are like this, and I don't know what things were like a hundred years ago, or ten thousand years ago, so I don't know if the state of the world has improved or gotten worse.

“I've read many books and gleaned some principles from them, but the more I learn, the more uncertain I become of whether the principles that I've thought of in my head are correct. Not only that, but are my principles necessarily going to be able to make a positive change in my life and the lives of those around me?

“Prior to coming here, I had a little girl by my side, and at the time, I felt like I could make her life better. However, after seeing Gu Can, I realized that perhaps I was wrong. The little girl could only live a slightly better life when she's with me, but that doesn't necessarily mean that the principles I imparted upon her could allow her to live an easier or better life.

“Everyone wants to live, and everyone wants to live well. Who doesn't want every single tomorrow to be better than today? I want that as well. Back in Clay Vase Alley, on the journey to the Great Sui Nation, to Stalactite Mountain, to the Parasol Leaf Continent, to the Lotus Flower Blessed Land, then back home.

“At all of those points in time, I've been constantly hoping for a better life. However, even if there aren't paramount principles that can transcend above all else under the heavens, at the very least, there are basic concepts of right and wrong, are there not? Even if we were forced to do many, many things for the sake of survival, those things can still be categorized as right or wrong, can they not?"

Gu Can's chopsticks fell still as he fell into deep thought.

The woman took a glance at Chen Ping'an, then at Gu Can, and she said, "Chen Ping'an, I'm just an illiterate woman who's never read a book in her life, so I don't understand all of that. I don't think about so many things, nor do I have the capacity to consider so many things.

“All I want is for Gu Can and I to live and live well. It's only because we were able to survive to this point that we had the chance to hear from you that my husband is still alive, and that a reunion is still possible for our family. Can you understand what I'm trying to convey, Chen Ping'an? I hope you won't denounce me for my ignorance."

"I can understand, and I certainly won't look down on you," Chen Ping'an replied with a nod.

The woman looked into Chen Ping'an's eyes for a moment, then poured herself a cup of wine before downing it in one go. She then poured herself another cup of wine before immediately downing that as well.

"No matter what you said to Can'er, he's very happy that you came to see him, so I have to drink to that. I also have to drink to the piece of good news that you brought to us."

She then downed a third cup of wine, and tears were swimming in her eyes as she concluded, "Most importantly of all, you've grown so tall and mature, and you're still safe and sound. That's more worthy of celebration than anything, so that's one more thing that I had to drink to."

Chen Ping'an poured a cup of wine for himself before downing it as well.

————

Inside the pavilion in Pond Water City, Cui Chan mused, "That woman from Clay Vase Alley is far from ignorant as she claims. In fact, she's nothing short of remarkable. No wonder she was able to work together with Liu Zhimao to raise someone like Gu Can."

While Chen Ping'an followed the two horse-drawn carriages into the city, Cui Dongshan had played dead the entire time, but he had already opened his eyes when Chen Ping'an revealed himself to Gu Can.

Hence, just like Cui Chan, he had seen and heard everything that had happened from that point onward.

Cui Chan smiled as he continued, "Chen Ping'an's words are completely wasted here. Even though they had all come from Clay Vase Alley and initially experienced similar hardships, right now, Gu Can and Chen Ping'an are two completely different people, not just in their respective standpoints, but in the way that they see this world.

“They are vastly different on a fundamental level, and Chen Ping'an is only able to empathize with Gu Can because he's embarked on such a long journey, but the same does not apply to Gu Can. To him, the entire world is comprised solely of Clay Vase Alley and Bamboo Scroll Lake. On top of that, he has a very narrow-minded personality that often leads him to emotional extremes.

“Even if his father were currently standing before him in Chen Ping'an's place, he still wouldn't be able to alter Gu Can's personality. What's interesting is that it's precisely Gu Can's tendency to go to emotional extremes that's led him to develop such a strong attachment to Chen Ping'an, so he was being perfectly earnest when he told Chen Ping'an that he wouldn't retaliate, even if Chen Ping'an were to beat him to death.

“Those are some extremely precious emotions, and Chen Ping'an is aware of that, which is why this situation is all the more painful to him. Back when Liu Xianyang was about to pass on from this world, he hadn't displayed any resentment or blame toward Chen Ping'an. Instead, all he had expressed to Chen Ping'an was an unwillingness to accept his fate and die, and that memory would only serve to further compound his pain. Such is human nature.

“Everyone starts off as a frog at the bottom of a well, but some will eventually leave the well. However, when they turn back to tell those still at the bottom of the well about the principles that they had gleaned, their words would only fall upon deaf ears because deep down, those still at the bottom of the well won't accept those principles. In their minds, those high and mighty principles don't apply to the wretched individuals still rolling around in the mud at the bottom of the well, and heeding those principles would be a surefire path to an early grave.

“Fortunately, Chen Ping'an has already come to realize this, and that's why what he was saying to Gu Can on the way to his manor and what he just said at the table after having that bowl of rice were worlds apart. It's just a pity that Gu Can was still too young back on Clay Vase Alley, so he didn't get to see what Chen Ping'an had to suffer through back when he was his age, nor did he witness all of the trials and tribulations that Chen Ping'an had to face over the course of his long journey.

“All he sees is Chen Ping'an with a sword on his back, bestowing that jade pendant upon the little catfish. He sees a mature Chen Ping'an who knows far more about the world than he does, but he doesn't know how Chen Ping'an was able to get to this point, nor is he necessarily willing to find out. In contrast, Chen Ping'an is willing to ponder things on a deeper level, and that's why this mess will only become messier and messier.

“If the two of them could swap places, with Chen Ping'an embarking on that long journey with Gu Can's personality, while Gu Can stayed on Cyan Gorge Island with Chen Ping'an's personality, then we wouldn't be dealing with such an irresolvable conundrum. Then again, if that were the case, then we wouldn't even be sitting here right now."

In the end, Cui Chan turned to Cui Dongshan as he concluded, "Overall, your teacher has already done exceptionally well."

"I didn't think that the eyes of an old dog like yourself would be capable of beholding beauty," Cui Dongshan harrumphed coldly.

Cui Chan wasn't bothered by the insult, and he smiled as he said, "There are two areas in which Chen Ping'an has done splendidly well on this trip to Cyan Gorge Island, and they're two concepts that you've spoken to me about in the past, namely severance and delineation. On the louchuan, he brought out their only remaining common ground and set it down right in between the two of them.

“Otherwise, he would've already lost back on the louchuan, and you and I would've been able to leave this city. He did that to test that assassin, both to better understand the hearts of the people in Bamboo Scroll Lake, as well as to tell Gu Can that the assassin should be killed no matter where they were, and that he was willing to listen to Gu Can's principles.

“If Chen Ping'an were to elevate his own principles to too great an extent, referring to them as reflections of the highest standard of morality in order to try and influence Gu Can, then there's a good chance that Gu Can will will feel as if Chen Ping'an is no longer the same person that he once was, thereby driving a permanent wedge between them.

“After disembarking from the louchuan, he gave the jade pendant that once belonged to that sage from the Confucian temple to Liu Zhimao, knowing that Liu Zhimao would be able to recognize the jade pendant, in which case he wouldn't dare to meddle with Chen Ping'an's affairs.

“At the table, he intentionally removed Gu Can's mother from the conversation, limiting her ability to interfere with him and influence Gu Can. Otherwise, what was already a chaotic mess would've only become more chaotic with her inclusion."

"Even so, will that really do anything? Is this still not an irresolvable conundrum?" Cui Dongshan asked with a cold smile.

Cui Chan nodded in response.

"As long as Chen Ping'an is unable to overcome the hurdle in his heart, no matter what he does from here, he'll only sink deeper and deeper into the hole. Even if Gu Can is willing to apologize, what good will that do him? There are so many innocent people who lost their lives under unjust circumstances, and they'll cling to him like vengeful spirits, pounding on the door to his heart day and night, dragging down on his conscience like dead weights.

“In reality, there are four hurdles facing Chen Ping'an, the first of which is whether Gu Can is willing to admit fault. The second hurdle is for Chen Ping'an to sort through all of the principles that he's read from books, heard from others, and thought of himself to find the truly important foundational principles among them.

“The third hurdle is that after finding these foundational principles, he could come to realize that he's actually been wrong all along, and the difficulty there will be whether he can remain true to himself after that. The fourth hurdle is deciding what to do after overcoming the first three hurdles. The most difficult of those hurdles are the third and fourth ones, and the third hurdle is one that Chen Ping'an will be destined to be unable to overcome."

"What about the fourth hurdle?" Cui Dongshan asked.

"The difficulty in the fourth hurdle lies in the fact that it encompasses countless hurdles," Cui Chan replied in a mysterious manner, while Cui Dongshan gave a cold sneer in response.

Cui Chan remained unbothered as he continued, "If Chen Ping'an really does have what it takes to reach the fourth hurdle, then once we've seen him overcome this hurdle, we'll be able to see why there are so many foolish and immoral people in the world, as well as why everyone clearly knows so many principles that would better their lives, but there are still many people who are living worse than dogs.

“Those are the people that become the likes of Zhu Lu, the empress of our Great Li Empire, and Du Mao. Why can't we all be Qi Jingchun or A'Liang? Unfortunately, Chen Ping'an won't be able to make it to this point, because if he does, then he will have already lost.

“When that time comes, and you still want to stay, then you can remain here and watch your teacher slowly wither away, both mentally and physically. As for myself, I will definitely already have been long gone by then."

"Why are you in such a hurry to leave? Are you about to die soon?" Cui Dongshan jeered.

Cui Chan burst into laughter as he pointed a finger at Cui Dongshan and said, "You have to learn to be more calm and placid like your teacher. Only by controlling your temper can you have control over yourself."

He then turned his gaze back to the scroll on the ground as he continued, "I still don't think Gu Can will even admit to any wrongdoing. What do you think?"

Cui Dongshan closed his eyes again and offered no response. It wasn't that he was pretending to be dead. Rather, it felt more like he was resigning himself to his fate and was awaiting death.

"As the saying goes, there are no never-ending banquets. In some cases, the banquet remains, but the people have already left, and all of the seats are vacant. However, when it comes to the banquet that is Cyan Gorge Island, even though the people still remain, the banquet is already as good as over.

“The hearts of those in attendance are no longer connected, so it may as well just be a happenstance gathering of a bunch of strangers," Cui Chan murmured to himself.

————

Chen Ping'an was led by Gu Can to an opulent room, rather than an independent courtyard.

It was right next to one of the rooms that Gu Can would occasionally stay in.

Chen Ping'an told Gu Can to go and have a heart to heart conversation with his mother, but after leaving Chen Ping'an's room, Gu Can decided not to go find his mother. Instead, he went on a stroll to take his mind off things, and it didn't take long before the little catfish began to trail along behind him.

It communicated to Gu Can using its mind's lake that upon seeing the jade tablet, Liu Zhimao initially dismissed it as a counterfeit, but upon verifying its authenticity, he seemed to have been scared witless.

Gu Can smiled as he replied, "I told you that Chen Ping'an was definitely going to become a very remarkable person, yet you didn't believe me. How about now? Do you believe me now?"

The little catfish heaved a faint sigh.

At the moment, Gu Can was really tempted to go and kill that Golden Core Tier woman who had already been locked up in that water cage, but following his conversation with Chen Ping'an, he knew that killing that Luminous Vermilion Empire assassin would've been a completely pointless endeavor.

Chen Ping'an wasn't bothered by these assassins or all of those enemy cultivators. Instead, he was enraged by the injustice of all of the innocent girls who had lost their lives in the mouth of the little eel, as well as all of the so-called "ants" that had been wiped out across all of the islands, the people who were just like what he and Gu Can had been back on Clay Vase Alley.

"I have some things that I want to say to Chen Ping'an, but would it be appropriate to go and find him now?" Gu Can suddenly asked.