Chapter 97: The First Thing You Do Every Morning

“I swear! I’ll never do it again!” Qin Ye exclaimed without any hesitation. Between integrity and his life, the latter was clearly more important.

Just then, as soon as he finished saying that, Arthis’ body suddenly shone brightly.

Both of them were stunned.

“This is…” Arthis looked at her own body with disbelief. Starting from her clothes, her entire body had slowly but surely begun to disintegrate, transforming into little black butterflies that floated into the air as though ash swept away by the wind.

The number of butterflies seemed to grow exponentially… In a matter of three seconds, only her upper body remained. Simultaneously, the throng of butterflies in the air began to converge into a huge vortex of black butterflies!

“Lord Harken’s final strike… has actually destroyed my physical body?!”

Boom!!!

In the very next second, her entire body crumbled, and the vortex of black butterflies was instantly reduced to ashes with a resounding scream.

The only things that remained in the room were Qin Ye and a clump of golden soulfire.

The reversal had come far too suddenly and quickly, so much so that the atmosphere was extremely awkward.

“About that…” Seconds later, the golden soulfire trembled slightly, and then she coughed dryly in a feeble attempt to maintain her composure, “Why don’t you find me a suitable body first, and then we’ll find a nice place to have a cup of tea and talk about life?”

Qin Ye had already transformed back into his human state. He tidied up his clothes, straightened his belt, and even pulled out a mirror from somewhere to comb out his somewhat disheveled hair.

Ahh… you’re still just as handsome as ever…

“Life… is just full of surprises, isn’t it?” He put away the mirror and glanced at the soulfire with a smirk.

Arthis felt the rage that she had just fervently suppressed instantly soar back up.

Qin Ye complained, victimizing himself, “But it hurt so much where you pinched me.”

“I’m beginning to regret not slapping you to death just now!”

Qin Ye’s gaze gleamed, “Arti~...”

Arthis gnashed her teeth, “Didn’t you swear earlier…”

“Hmm?”

“... That’s fine… let’s talk about it! I can’t hold on much longer!”

“That’s more like it.” Qin Ye waved his hand, and the demonhead saber flew straight back to him, “Come, come, come. Come into your brother’s warm embrace. In the meantime, you can also reflect on how we should be getting along with each other in the future. Once you’re done with that, you can also take out any secret arts of Hell, secret news, and the like… and hand them all over to me.”

“Otherwise…” He stared at Arthis as she eagerly dove into the demonhead saber, and then wickedly picked up the wrappings of the soul sphere and began to wrap them around his saber, “Things like bondage…. isn’t something you really want to know about…”

Arthis felt incomparably humiliated to be seeking refuge within a demonhead saber.

Her heart felt as though it had been pierced with a thousand holes.

That’s right. She hadn’t truly intended to kill Qin Ye.

Their current circumstances were excellent. It was completely different from just a few months ago, when she had still been attempting to steal Wang Zemin’s soul in the depths of the old Hell.

The shard of King Yanluo’s Seal had recognised its new owner, and the new order of Hell had also received the approbation of the Heavenly Dao. Her best bet right now would be to extend a hand and cooperate with Qin Ye.

The only outstanding gripe she had was with Qin Ye’s lazy and wimpy personality. She had intended to use the earlier opportunity to teach him a lesson, and also shift the balance of power in her favour.

But who would have thought… that she wasn’t even given a chance to put on a show!

“This author is…” She sighed wistfully, “Far too much of a crowd pleaser…”

Resistance was futile. When the elevator ascended back into Insignia University’s campus grounds, she muttered lifelessly, “Bring me around for a spin.”

“Oh? Who gave you the confidence to make demands now?”

Arthis fervently suppressed the desire to turn into a suicide bomber and die together with Qin Ye. Gnashing her teeth, she responded, “Fine! I’ll find myself a passable host!”

“You don’t trust my judgment?”

“With that simplistic aesthetics of yours?” Arthis responded disdainfully.

Qin Ye was in a good mood. Hell had just been formally established, and the mystery surrounding the Exalted Father’s identity had also been resolved. There was nothing else within the City of Salvation that was holding him back. In one week’s time, he would sneak back into Limbo and steal a glance at the fruits of his labour.

What’s next?

Oh… I’ll still have to be a good instructor and get by in the City of Salvation. Slowly but surely, I’ll continue to develop and mature, until I finally become a peerless existence! Hehehe…

The gods have descended! All hail the king!

My appointment as an instructor couldn’t have come at a better time!

With bright spirits, he brought Arthis straight into the abandoned girls’ dorms.

It was still broad daylight right now. Thousands of students and teachers alike had been evacuated from Insignia University in the span of a few days’ time. Everyone had been in a rush to leave, and the entire dorm reeked of a hasty retreat.

“I’d considered this before…” Qin Ye looked at the mess in the room, and picked up a packet from the ground, “I want to be an angel in my next life.”

“With long beautiful wings, and the freedom to lean close to the bosom of beautiful women. So…” He placed the packet beside the demonhead saber, “I’ll give you a chance.”

Arthis glanced at the bag of Souermei, “Wearing wings and leaning close to women’s hearts… Would you believe it if I tell you that I’m prepared to be cremated on the spot with you right now?”

“... Then how about this Peppa Pig pillow?”

The image of a former Infernal Judge inhabiting a Peppa Pig pillow and conversing with a human on a daily basis was so beautiful that one could only tremble and shudder at the thought.

“Are you an idiot?”

“Dissatisfied? Then how about this? Pikachu?”

“Silly.”

“Why are you so difficult to please? How about this? Holy shit! A limited edition Teemo pillow? I can’t give you this…”

“Alright, I’ve got it! The Three Sword’s Flower Rose! This is it!”

Arthis couldn’t even be bothered to respond to him any longer. Instead, she remained motionless in a cold and distant posture.

Two hours later, Qin Ye was already tired and sweating profusely. He gritted his teeth and left the women’s dorms, “Can’t you just lower your expectations a little bit? You don’t want a mirror; you don’t want a pillow; and you don’t even want the bikini! Aren’t you able to inhabit just about any physical object? Do you really have to be so picky?”

Arthis gritted her teeth, “The precondition for my inhabitation is that it has to be something ordinary! What the heck is with that action figure with the spider costume on it?! Even if I’ve been dead for hundreds of years now, I’m still a woman! Do you understand? Woman!!”

Qin Ye deliberated thoughtfully, “So…”

Arthis was afraid that he would say something that would prick her heart even more, so she quickly bit the bullet and gave him the lowdown, “I… need something pretty.”

How much had it taken her to finally be released from the soul sphere? She no longer wanted to be trapped within something ugly and repulsive.

She wanted to live freely as a woman!

Qin Ye shook his head, “This is a students’ dorm after all. Where are we going to get some high quality goods like that?’

Arthis had also grown disheartened. This world is an evil place. I should never have suggested that he find something for my inhabitation!

It was foolish. Truly foolish.

“What’s that place over there?” Just as she was wallowing in her own thoughts of hopelessness, she suddenly noticed a small cottage by the lake.

“That?” Qin Ye squinted his eyes, “Zhang Linhua mentioned something about that before. I think it’s… an on-campus apartment for the children of rich families. The rent there is no laughing matter.”

Arthis heaved a sigh of relief, “Let’s head over there.”

Before Qin Ye could respond, she added, “You can only understand style with money. This term is still something that is quite distant to you. Anyway… just trust me on this.”

Qin Ye didn’t have a choice. After all, he couldn’t let Arthis inhabit his demonhead saber indefinitely either.

When they entered the cottage, they discovered that it was similarly in a mess. There were even several pairs of branded leather shoes laying around that the prodigal son who had been staying here clearly no longer wanted. He hadn’t even bothered to pack them up properly.

“Your modern tastes are truly strange.” Arthis frowned at the room filled with discarded goods, “There are so many things out there with thousands of years of history behind them, but you simply refuse to use those things. Instead, you prefer things that are japanese-style or european-style. Look, even the frame of the mirror has a carving of some wounded, half-naked disabled woman on it.”

Qin Ye was equally disdainful of having to explain to Arthis what the Venus de Milo was.

This was a generation gap.

“Take a look for yourself, and let me know if you see anything you like. I’ll bring it over for you.” Qin Ye sighed and sank into the soft, lush sofa.

It was comfortable.

Arthis glanced around. Then, her voice suddenly turned grave, “Kid, there’s… someone here.”

Someone?

Qin Ye abruptly opened his eyes. Arthis’ voice continued, “I see someone laying on the bed, under the blanket. I can see the hand.”

A corpse?

Qin Ye immediately rushed over and lifted the blanket at one go. His expression of realization was incredibly delightful.

It’s truly someone…

A silicone doll…

It was an exquisitely made, life-size doll, made with the most advanced 3D modelling technology out there. The doll wore a traditional costume which was also of incredibly high quality. It was rather apparent that the owner of this place clearly had a unique love for such things. The entire doll was practically in pristine conditions, without a single sign of damage anywhere.

Is it really well-maintained… or is he just simply unable to do it… Gossipy thoughts immediately filled Qin Ye’s mind.

“This costs well in the tens of thousands…” He exclaimed with resignation, and was about to turn around and shake his head, when he noticed that the demonhead saber had already flown over right beside him, and the golden soulfire was glowing brightly.

Just as he was about to set the blanket back down, Arthis suddenly cried out, “Wait a minute!”

Her voice was filled with a trace of joy for the first time, “What’s this?”

“An inflatable doll?” Qin Ye responded in bewilderment, “Eh, no. This might be a 100% silicone doll. It probably doesn’t need inflating…”

“It’ll do.”

“... I’d never thought I would see something so repulsi--... What did you say?!” Qin Ye’s tone of voice suddenly increased by three full octaves.

Did I hear you wrongly?

“It’ll do.” The demonhead saber tilted slightly to the side as though it were giving Qin Ye a baffled look, “Its beauty is finally something that’s comparable with a tenth of my beauty, and the traditional costume that it’s wearing is easy on the eyes as well… Did you have something to say?”

And there’s still its function to consider?

Pew! Qin Ye watched in stunned silence as the golden clump of soulfire floated out and shot into the silicone doll’s forehead. His lips opened dryly for several seconds, before he finally found the words to express himself, “Nothing… it’s a perfect choice… perfect…”

Shk… Ten seconds after the soulfire entered the silicone doll’s body, the sleeping doll slowly opened its eyes and sat up from the bed.

Arthis looked at her newly acquired body, stretched her fingers and gave a gentle flick. A mirror in the corner of the room instantly shattered.

“Not bad.” The corners of the silicone doll’s mouth curled up with a satisfied expression, “The only gripe is that it’s slightly too fragile.”

The irony was completely stifling!

Qin Ye had never expected Arthis to pick the only object that Qin Ye had never even considered - it was the single, most humiliating option!

Can you imagine a functioning silicone doll seated beside you, conversing with you on a daily basis?

Can you imagine how a visitor would react when the first thing he sees is the life-size silicone doll?

And it was a silicone doll that smelled of other men to boot!

Generation gap… this can only be explained by the generational gap…

“Is there still… any room for discussion?”

“I’ve already decided on it.” Arthis’ tyrannical disposition flared up once more as she spoke imperiously, “I’m pleased… And why are you stammering and stuttering? Be more straightforward! Act like a man!”

Qin Ye gulped several times, before finally rolling his eyes with resignation, “Let me… leave you with a few last words…”

“The first thing you should do every morning now is to pump yourself up.”

1. This is a brand of leggings/stockings.

2. This refers to a character in a Xianxia web novel.

3. This makes reference to the ancient greek statue that was believed to depict Aphrodite.