Chapter 293: The Sword Emperor’s Return (1)

The Sword Emperor was too powerful to be considered an average Hunter.

“Hello, idiots! You should air out your rooms every now and then. If you stay in your rooms all day and night, it messes with your brains, you guys. Well, I’m feeling generous today! So, I’ll remodel your place for free today!

Hehe

.”

He was way too screwed-up in the head for others to see him as human. The Magic Tower elder gritted her teeth. She had many subordinates and had brought down six Constellations to their knees until now, meaning that six realms had submitted to mages. The fiftieth floor had long been their territory, so why was this happening?

“Why can’t we take down one ape?!” the elder screamed.

“Because I’m one hell of a strong ape.”

The elder was so furious that she replied with a “fuck you” almost instantly. If that guy had been a warrior with some dignity, she could have admitted defeat. He didn’t have to be awe-inspiring. Had he just been at least somewhat respectful, the elder would have gladly accepted defeat and handed over the throne of the fiftieth floor to him. However, she could never admit defeat to such a thug even if it meant dying.

“I can’t just hand over victory to you! You son of a bitch! Just kill us, Sword Emperor!”

“Oh, then let’s do this. From now on, every time you call me a son of a bitch, I’ll take down one of your towers. Deal?”

“What? What the heck—”

The Sword Emperor lightly swung his sword. All the Hunters on the fiftieth floor realized that, even though he was son of a bitch, he didn’t bluff when it came to fighting.

One of the towers, which had a proud history spanning a millennium, was cut off. The elder went crazy.

“

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

No! Stop him! My research data! My experiment materials! No,

ah

, the Constellation! Get the Constellation that is sealed underground! And that son of a bi—”

“Are you sure about that? If you call me that one more time, another one of your precious towers will be gone.”

“... b-bee! Son of a bee!”

“Oh, right. There are a lot of bees in the world, and some of them have a son or two. I’ll let that slide.”

The elder felt like she was going crazy. No, she already had. If only she could punch that idiot in the face, she would be okay with losing all the research data she had gathered in that tower over the past two hundred years.

She had been called many derogatory names, like a thousand-year-old monster, but now she was nothing more than an ordinary lunatic. The Sword Emperor had a knack for driving mad anyone who faced him.

“I’ll kill you!” the elder swore. “I’ll kill you! I’ll preserve the tower you destroyed forever! And the day you return to the fiftieth floor, you son of a bee, I’ll get your ass and lock you in the basement of that ruined tower! Forever! I’ll stake your heart there!”

The Sword Emperor clicked his tongue and slung his sword over his shoulder. “That’s why you guys will lose. You should plan to chase me, not wait for me to return.”

“What?”

“I am the Sword Emperor, the greatest swordsman in the Ten Thousand Sword Realm. And I’ll be the first swordsman of the Righteous Faction in the universe to conquer the Tower’s one hundredth floor!”

The Hunters who were watching this exchange experienced something at this declaration. Maybe they had been too complacent with reality. Hunters were meant to climb the Tower. It was wrong to hunt the newbies who had just come up to the fiftieth floor and idle in the world of beginners.

Yes, the Sword Emperor had a profound reason to destroy the tower. Even though a faction had ruled over the fiftieth floor for a long time, they couldn’t hold onto their power forever! Anyone could become a rebel. The Sword Emperor himself held up his sword to spread his wise words, so praise to him. From now on, we were all going to serve him and become believers of the Sword Emperor Chur—

Hey there, Mr. Bee

.

—Huh? What the heck? I was just about to reach the climax.

Stop with your bullshit and show me the way, please.

That was the Guardian’s old tale.

***

While listening to the Guardian’s old tale, which was a pretty useless story of bravery, I advanced deeper into the Magic Tower. Moving around the place wasn’t as difficult as infiltrating had been.

Speaking of the Guardian, now that he was in a place connected to his past, he appeared to be in a good mood.

—These guys focused too much on external security. Only a few people successfully infiltrated this place, so there were very few intruders throughout the years. Because of this, the Spiders had no reason to review their internal security system. On top of that, an insider is guiding you.

Like the Guardian said, an insider of the Magic Tower was faithfully guiding me. His name was Charumu, or something like that. The boy mage kept shaking as he walked forward. His bangs were so long that I couldn’t see his expression, but he seemed to be very timid.

“

Urgh...

If the Big Spiders find out what I’m doing, they’ll kill me. I’ve betrayed the Magic Tower. If I get caught—no, I’ll

definitely

get caught—I’ll have my stomach ripped open while I’m still alive. The Big Spiders will want to see how colorful my mana is, make sashimi out of my duodenum, marinate it in a potion, and roast it... I’m scared! They’ll record each note of the screams that emerge from the pit of my stomach, turn them into an a cappella song, and play it every time they torture me! I’m scared, so, so scared...”

He imagined his future that far ahead, yet was still cooperating with me? Rather than being timid, he was more like a warrior from a story who had lost his sense of fear. Just as I was starting to feel a little creeped out by my guide’s unusual personality, Charumu suddenly stopped, holding his magic staff in his arms. The boy trembled under the weight of the staff, which was taller than him.

“

Ah

, wait. Please, stop. A security guard is standing there. He’ll probably notice if we go further.”

“There’s security?”

Charumu flinched at my question, running his fingers through his bangs. “Yes, yes. He’s not very strong, but he’s still in charge of keeping watch over Hamustra’s followers. He’s a Spider with sharp senses. And you, Mr. Intruder, shouldn’t kill him. If he dies, an alarm will automatically be triggered in the entire Magic Tower.”

I stroked my chin. “

Aha

, I see. This is a bit tricky.”

What should I do? It would be easy to approach and knock out the guard before anyone noticed. Still, I wanted to avoid taking risks as much as possible.

Seeing me like that, Boy Mage Charumu stammered, “B-but there is a way...”

“

Hmm?

”

“I’ll go and distract the guard.

Tsk

, you’re probably a great fighter, aren’t you? I’m sure you’ll be able to finish the job while the guard is messing with me...”

For an insider who had cried and begged me not to kill him, he was surprisingly proactive.

I tilted my head, confused. “If you really do that, it’ll make things much easier for me, but are you sure you’ll be okay?”

“I... no... I might not be okay. This is not okay at all, but now my life depends on you, Mr. Intruder. If you succeed, I’ll live, and if you fail, I-I’ll die.”

“

Oh.

”

Even though he was a low-ranking mage, he was still a mage. Although he had surrendered only a few minutes ago, the speed at which he thought so far ahead was amazing.

Although I was feeling satisfied with my guide’s energy, Charumu continued to mutter, “If you fail, Mr. Intruder, your internal organs will be skewered and roasted crisp in the blazing fire using Cerberus’ poop as firewood. The skewer of my duodenum will be next to it. You and I will share a bond of internal organs.”

What kind of bond was this guy blabbering about? It sounded very unpleasant. Moreover, no matter how I looked at this boy, he didn’t seem normal. Honestly, he was a little scary.

Charumu walked away, dragging his cloak behind him. “Well, then, I’ll go first.”

[The Lonely Seeker watches your secret infiltration with interest.]

[The Labyrinth-Dwelling Eye predicts that your guide will betray you.]

[The Incarnation of Love and Lust gives a generous score to the boy with the bangs.]

After a few steps, Charumu turned around the corner. For a moment, the only sound that could be heard from behind the corner was the boy’s bare feet splashing the water puddles in the passage. Someone soon spoke to the mage boy.

“Hey, stop! Who’s that? Come any closer and I’ll shoot you.”

Charumu shouted, “I’m sorry! Please don’t kill me!”

“What? It’s just a bug.”

I got closer so I could eavesdrop on their conversation. The owner of the voice seemed to let down his guard as soon as he recognized Charumu, seemingly looking down on him. Well, that was exactly what was going on.

“What are you doing here, bug?”

“I-I was cleaning the sewer until I lost my mop.

Um

, do you, by any chance, have a spare mop? Could you lend it to me?” Charumu asked.

The man smirked. “What, a mop?

Haha.

You have a mop right there.”

“W-what?”

“You. I’m talking about you, bug.

You’re

the mop. Look at your cloak. Just roll around and mop the floor. You didn’t need to come all the way here to borrow another one.”

Thump!

It sounded like Charumu got hit.

“

Argh!

” he groaned.

“Mop worm, worm mop. It rolls off the tongue nicely. Very poetic. Hey, I’ve been feeling bored and annoyed for a while. I couldn’t hit the prisoners even once because the Big Spiders told me to never do that, but

they

do it all the time!”

Familiar sounds resounded one after another from around the corner.

“

Eek, ugh. Agh!

”

𝑓𝓇𝘦ℯ𝘸𝘦𝑏𝓃𝑜𝘷ℯ𝑙.𝑐𝑜𝓂

“I took on the guard duty because I thought I could have some fun, but this is just a waste of my precious time. I need to research, too! I can clearly see the other guys getting ahead of themselves! This is a big problem!”

“I’m sorry...

Ugh!

I’m sorry—”

Okay. Charumu attracted so much attention that the guard could see nothing but him. I immediately dove around the corner and entered the passage, passing the guard without making a single sound.

The guard mage yelped after sensing my presence. He looked no more than a few years older than Charumu. As I expected, the guard had knocked Charumu down and kicked him. Now, he stood frozen as he looked around.

“What—”

Unfortunately for him, I was already behind him. I touched the back of his head with my finger and forcibly poured my aura into his spine. The guard fainted with a single groan.

Thump.

He collapsed next to Charumu, who was lying face down, curled up like a hamster after getting beaten. Immediately, he looked up. “

Ah...

”

“Good job. Thanks to you, I was able to subdue him easily.” I patted Charumu on the head. Then, I moved to search through the unconscious guard’s pockets and got a bunch of old keys. “From now on, I’ll ensure your well-being.”

“R-really?”

“Of course, it’s only right to take responsibility for my own people. You betrayed the Magic Tower, a faction you had worked for your entire life, and joined my side to help me. I should help you survive and settle down properly in my world.”

“Really? Are you serious? C-can you swear on the Constellation you believe in? I mean, of course, I believe what you say, Mr. Intruder. What I’m trying to say is—”

I smiled. “People have been deceiving you a lot,

huh?

I don’t have a particular Constellation that I serve, but I do have a person who is precious to me. Fine. I swear on the name of Ivansia. This means a lot, you know.”

“

Ah.

” Charumu covered his face with his hands and sobbed. “Thank you... Thank you, Mr. Intruder. Thank you.”

“It’s nothing.”

I turned my back on him, feeling a strange sense of satisfaction.

A typical prison stood before me. It was dark behind the bars, so I couldn’t see very well, but I could clearly sense the presence of prisoners. Among them was probably the Assistant Writer that Hamustra had mentioned.

“Okay. Now that the guard passed out, it’s time to release the followers—”

Screeeeeeeeech!

A screeching metallic sound tore through the prison, through the corridors, and perhaps even through the entire Magic Tower. It was a noise that made people instinctively shiver. I unleashed my aura to protect my hearing, then looked around in confusion. “Alarm?

Alarm?!

What?”

And then I realized that Charumu had stabbed the guard mage with a dagger. His chest was covered in blood. It was clear that the guard mage had died before he could do anything.

“

Ugh, ugh. Whoa...

” Charumu wiped his sweaty bangs away with his bloody hands. “I finally killed him.”

I was shocked. “Excuse me!”

“Yes, Mr. Intruder?”

“Why did you kill the guard?”

“

Huh?

” Charumu blinked, seemingly not understanding my question. “Well, because he's a son of a bitch that deserves to die. He’s thirty years younger than me, but some Big Spiders favored him, so he became cocky. I’ve been cleaning the sewers for a hundred thirty-one years, ten months, and twenty-one days, but he’s already a guard. Then, then, he did the unforgivable... he also beat me... a lot. You could say this was inevitable karma.”

I could barely speak. “What? Wasn’t it you who told me not to kill anyone recklessly? The alarm would sound if a guard died, so that’s why I needed to be careful.”

Charumu tilted his head in confusion. “

Huh?

Not really. I said that

you

shouldn’t kill the guard. If anyone were to kill this son of a bitch, that should be

me

.”

Yes, my premonitions were never wrong. Whenever I felt that someone was crazy, they always proved to be one-hundred-percent crazy. Not once had my intuition proved to be wrong.

Ah, fuck. Why did I trust this guy? Why this hairless chimpanzee out of everyone else?

Charumu continued, “

Ah

, of course, the alarm went off, so our bond of internal organ skewers has become stronger. But, if you think of it as the price to practice a little justice in this world, isn’t it a small price to pay?”

Screech! Screeeeeech!

The unpleasant alarm kept ringing. With reality crashing down around me, the Guardian spoke to me.

—I told you that there are only loonyheads on the fiftieth floor. Why did you ignore your heavenly senior’s advice? That’s why you’re in this situation, Zombie.

You’re the worst loonyhead of all!