Chapter 287: The Fiftieth Floor (1)

The grand debut performance of the Black Paladin King ended in utter failure. The Paladin covered her face to hide her desperation.

“This can’t be happening...”

Perhaps she had been practicing the Cavefire play too diligently over the past month. Every gesture and movement was too theatrical. The Paladin’s pose was basically an artwork titled Despair. Unfortunately, it was the kind of artwork that wouldn’t earn a single cent. Only after the creator was buried in a coffin would the price skyrocket.

The Paladin laughed, though there was no humor behind it. “I just wanted to perform again... I may have been too greedy.”

At her feet lay discarded paper letters of disappointment, scattered like the leaves of a ginkgo tree. It was a salad of malice mixed with curses and contempt.

—This is the worst.

—I don’t know what sins my ears committed in their past life to deserve to hear this kind of performance.

“I’ll retire now, Kim Gong-Ja. No, I don’t mean that I’ll retire as a musician. I want to retire from being a Hunter and a human...”

Uuuuh?

“Yes, just as I expected, the ignorant public doesn’t understand us.”

I quickly turned around. “Black Dragon Master?”

“Humans are all trash. They don’t even remember what they’ve done. They’re animals who feed on their past as if it’s their flesh...

Haha.

Do we really need to sacrifice ourselves for these animals, Gong-Ja?”

The Black Witch’s eyes sparkled dangerously. As expected of the Black Dragon Master, Anastasha seemed to have truly embraced darkness.[1] She laughed as if she was the mastermind behind the curtains. Hearing this from up close sent chills down my spine.

“Death King! You are no longer my master!” the Inquisitor announced with a smile.

No, upon a closer look, he wasn’t the Inquisitor. It was a blonde Welsh Corgi with the Inquisitor’s hairstyle. In other words, he was a dog, panting and wagging his tail.

“I was born with the mission to guide lowly mankind!

Woof!

Now I understand why the gods of the universe have been whispering to me endlessly. I’m the promised savior! Don’t worry,

Woof!

Death King, you will be placed in a special cage and provided with three meals of premium beef jerky!

Woooof!

”

“Why the heck are you yapping?” I facepalmed. “

Oh

, fuck. You’re

literally

yapping.”

“

Oi, oi

, Death King.”

“What is it, Rao Fan? Wait, why are you holding my Shiny? And why the heck are you blushing?”

“

Oh

, it’s embarrassing for me to say this, but...”

[Shiny declares that she will speak.]

Shiny was really shiny. I had given one heck of a name to my sword.

[Shiny says that she and the Viper have started dating.]

Pardon?

[Shiny sings that, after confirming that her former master is safe and seeing that the current master is happy with his partner, she also wants to find her own happiness.]

[Shiny hums that, one day, the plaintive warrior caught her eye. It made her decide that he should have a sword like her by his side.]

“I feel the same way, you know? The tradition of having heroines trapped inside swords is long-standing. It’s a shame that this sword isn’t a katana renowned for its exceptional sharpness, but that’s also part of everyday life that I have to endure.”

“The fuck,” I muttered.

The Viper was being Viper. Shiny, who was at least ten thousand years old, was acting like a teenager who just fell in love for the first time, but she was... a sword. It was impossible for me to determine who was more fucked up. Could it be that neither of them were? Maybe

I

was the truly fucked up person for thinking about this. Was it possible that the universe was filled with fucked up people, and I alone was the sane one?

At the very least, it was evident that the Welsh Corgi Inquisitor was a dog. He was still rubbing his cheek against my pants and wagging his tail enthusiastically while barking.

Was my life fucked up?

—Bloody hell.

I turned my head to see the Guardian looking as if all life had been sucked out of him.

—Hey, hey! Yeah, I’m a ghost that has to watch all kinds of fuckery, but freaking hell. Why do I have to witness all your crazy dreams with you, too? Huh? Wake up, Zombie! Get your ass up right now!

“Why? I think it’s funny. If you don’t like my crazy dreams, you can give me some other ideas instead.”

—You devilish fucker... Wait, sorry. I’m sorry. Zombie—no, Gong-Ja. Sir. Gong-Ja, I’m sorry! Don’t bring me into your insane dream! Stop! I don’t dance like that! Fucking stoooop!!!!

Now that I had my share of the Guardian’s screams, it was time to start the day.

***

—Seriously, just go up to the fiftieth floor already! I won’t help you at all and watch you get your ass kicked! You got so arrogant because you managed to defeat the Constellation Murderer once. That was pure luck! And the fiftieth floor is no joke. You got that? Don’t come crying and clinging to my leg when you go there later. I won’t give you a single word of advice.”

Come on. You’re a grown-up. Don’t sulk.

—Reflect on your fucked-up dreams at least once! This isn't a once-in-a-while thing! You have them every day!

Ignoring the Guardian’s complaints, I went downstairs. In the basement, I found the Paladin sitting on a chair. She was fully armored but had taken off her gauntlets and was fiddling with her smartphone. “

Oh

, you’re awake, Gong-Ja.”

“Yes. Good morning, Patricia.”

“Perfect timing,” the Paladin said with a smile as she held up her phone. “I was waiting for you to come down. Look at this. It’s amazing.”

“What is it?”

“Our Cavefire play. What else can it be? We’re slowly getting reactions for our last performance.

“

Ah.

”

Suddenly, I remembered the dream I had today. The memories about the Paladin saying she would retire because she had failed the performance crept into my mind. Uneasiness settled in my heart for no reason.

I stepped closer to look at her smartphone screen. “How is it? Are the reactions okay?”

As the Paladin scrolled, titles in huge fonts flashed by. She couldn’t contain her excitement. “It’s incredible! The internet is going wild! The outside world is amazed by our new kind of performance. Can you believe it? Renowned producers keep sending me emails.”

“Whoa.”

Fortunately, it seemed that the dream I had was just a silly one. I felt relieved and began reading the article titles one by one.

“Cavefire Play: A genre of dance that transcends physical limits.”

“Dancers, directors, and performers are one!”

“German maestro: ‘This is the jazz of dancing.’”

“A feast of aura that changes with every performance.”

“Is the Tower now trying to transcend the old world in art?”

The reactions were fire.

The corners of the Paladin’s mouth curled up in satisfaction. “There was even a special article about us. Seriously, when I used to play jazz, no one paid attention, but now they’re making a fuss. It feels bittersweet...”

“

Aaaaaaaaaargh!

”

A scream echoed from the other side of the basement. The Paladin glanced toward the source of the noise, and I followed her gaze. There, a metal-bar prison door stood ominously. Thankfully, the scream lasted only for a moment. We turned back to the phone as if nothing had happened.

“Woooow,” I said. “I had somewhat expected this, but this is truly amazing. The Past? Tiames? Aren’t these really famous newspapers?”

“They aren’t just famous. Aren’t you too oblivious to what is going on in the world? Both Anastasha and I stayed up all night checking reactions online.”

“I’ve realized how vain it was... Be careful. Seeing other people’s reactions can be an addiction on its own.”

She chuckled. “

Ummmmm.

Yes, of course, I’m aware. But it’s hard to resist the attention I get as an artist, not as the assistant leader of the Watchmen League. Look at every one of these comments; each of them is like a drug.”

“You’ll have to get used to it from now on, Great Director and Producer. This will become your daily routine.”

“

Haha.

The guild leader of the Black Paladin King is getting better at flattering day after—”

“

Aaaaaaaah!

”

Again, a scream rang out. We continued exchanging pleasantries without paying any attention to it. However, this time, the screaming was more persistent. It didn’t stop as quickly as before and continued on.

“S-stop! Please spare me!”

“Stop it now!

Aaaah!

”

“Stop, please! No more... Not there...”

“I will tell you everything, okay? I will tell you everything! Please don’t leave me alone!”

“Do you know who I am? Oh, just wait and see. Once I get out of here...”

We continued to play around, pretending nothing was going on around us. After about five minutes, the screaming subsided. In the meantime, we eagerly let anonymous journalists and critics online feed our egos. When our egos were so full that they almost threw up, the Paladin and I realized that it was pretty foolish to entrust our self-worth to this tiny smartphone.

Clink.

Just then, the metal bar door opened, and the Black Witch emerged from behind it.

“Good morning...

Huh?

What? You’re here too, Kim Gong-Ja?”

I waved. “Yes, good morning. Did you get anything?”

“Well... So-so. I feel like I already got all the information I can get.”

The Black Witch yawned and walked slowly toward a small pantry shelf in the corner of the basement. Her hands were flailing as she fumbled with the coffee filter.

“

Ah

, just sit down. I’ll make it for you,” I told her.

“Yeah... thank you.”

The Black Witch looked worn out. The dark bags under her eyes were so noticeable that it seemed like she hadn’t slept all night. As she sat on the chair I had offered her, she sighed in relief.

“This is the good thing about married men. Consideration and manners are built in them,” she murmured.

“That’s a stereotype, Anastasha. Not all married men are like that. I happen to be this considerate because this is the type of man I am.”

“

Ugh

, what the hell? You’re so full of yourself.”

“For example, I know that you like hazelnut latte. I even know that you like it hot and with an extra shot. Instead of making an Americano, I’ll prepare a hazelnut latte for you. Come on, be impressed.”

The Black Witch took a sip of the latte.

“

Huh?

Do you happen to be an extremely arrogant angel? Freaking hell, it’s yummy. By the way, you were right.”

I nodded. “As expected, there were traitors.”

“Yeah, there was a heretic group lurking within the Black Dragon and Pantheon.” Anastasha pulled out an old notebook. “The official name is the Blessing Tower Society. It’s a secret society that believes that the Babel Tower was a divine miracle and that humanity must respond to this miracle by purifying the Tower.”

“What does this purification process imply?”

“That’s their more sophisticated way of saying ‘terrorism.’ Well, they’re delusional. Two executives and eleven regular guild members were flying under the radar. It’s not a lot, but if we hadn’t noticed them now, their group would have likely grown in size.”

I received the notebook from Anastasha and looked through its contents.

—The Tower of Babel once fell, and God has given us another chance with the Tower to reach heaven.

—God ordered us to abandon the already defiled outside world and build a new kingdom within the Tower. So, with all our faith, we should bring his blessing to this place.

—Those who rule the Tower are nothing more than devils. Driving out these false rulers is...

These were whispers of fanaticism. The writing in the notebook was like scribble, but the end of each sentence had smudged fingerprints, revealing how many times its owner had carefully read it.

I swallowed hard. “Okay.”

In the what-if world the Tower master had shown me, the Black Witch had died because of this secret society, with the Inquisitor having met a similar fate. After I escaped that place, I wondered if this group had already started being active, so that led me to dig up information about them discreetly.

“I’m glad we found them now.”

Premonitions tended to be right. Many people were dissatisfied with the current system in which the Five Guilds held power. A blend of fanatic beliefs and madness lurked within the guilds like a malignant tumor.

“No! No more! D-don’t send me there! Don’t leave me alone!”

The fanatics were now trapped in their underground prisons, screaming for mercy.

The Black Witch shook her head. “The concubi made interrogations easier. I didn’t have to spill any blood. Back in the old days, a couple of guys would have already lost their heads.”

“How terrifying are their dreams for them to scream like that?” I asked.

“Not that much. They’re just dropped it onto a white horizon with nothing on it and left there for about thirty days of dream time.”

What the hell? When I glanced to the side, the Paladin also shook her head in disbelief. Although all of us had a knack for tormenting others, the Black Witch was unmatched.

Anastasha placed her coffee cup down. “Anyway, thanks to you, I was able to get my house organized. Thank you. I do want to ask how you figured it out, but that’s not important, so I won’t. What matters is that we eliminated a risk factor.”

“That’s right,” I replied.

“Okay, Mr. Leader.”

The screams echoed again from beyond the metal door. The Black Dragon Master clasped her hands and rested her chin above them, staring at me. “The traitors and fanatics have been dealt with. The people of the world were so absorbed in the Cavefire play that nobody noticed. What is our leader planning after such a perfect cleanup?”

I closed the notebook.

“There is only one thing left to do. I’ll go up to the fiftieth floor tomorrow.”

1. Gong-Ja is describing her as a chūnibyō. The symbol of chūnibyō is a black dragon in Korea because of Love, Chunibyo & Other Delusions. ☜