Chapter 417: Reunion - Kang Joo-Han and Goh Yoo-Joon’s story (3)

“You made it.”

Goh Yoo-Joon still thought about if it was actually possible for someone to die so suddenly.

‘Isn't that something that only happens in dramas or movies? Why did it have to be Suh Hyun-Woo?’

He struggled to hold back his tears as he saw Suh Hyun-Woo’s older sister patting his shoulder. It was only then that he realized the harsh truth of his old best friend’s death. “Noona, what happened?”

The funeral home’s atmosphere made the reality of death unavoidable. Goh Yoo-Joon let the dazed Kang Joo-Han walk ahead as he turned to Suh Hyun-Woo’s sister for answers.

How could someone just die like this? What had happened to Suh Hyun-Woo? Whatever the reason was, Goh Yoo-Joon couldn’t accept it.

“Ah, Yoo-Joon...”

“It’s okay, noona. Never mind. You don’t have to explain. I already heard the gist of it.”

The face of Hyun-Woo’s sister was red, and her voice was hoarse from crying so much. Goh Yoo-Joon felt it was cruel to ask her about the cause of death, so he quickly changed the subject and gently rubbed her back.

“Have you been able to sleep at all, noona?”

She looked utterly exhausted and tormented. Who can truly understand the grief of the bereaved?

At Yoo-Joon’s comforting words, Hyun-Woo’s sister began to cry again. “How scared he must have been in there...”

“...”

“How hot and painful it must have been...”

They had heard that the authorities couldn’t even recover his body because it was all burned. Not just Hyun-Woo, but all the victims of the plane crash likely died instantly upon impact. The news said they were still searching for survivors, but there was no hope. It only underscored the horrific nature of the accident. It was an overwhelmingly depressing situation.

After trying to comfort her, Goh Yoo-Joon stood up. “Noona, I’m going to pay my respects to Hyun-Woo. I’ll talk to you later.”

‘How did this happen? Where did it all go wrong? Is this really the end of Hyun-Woo’s life?’

As he walked toward where Kang Joo-Han stood by Suh Hyun-Woo’s memorial photo, Goh Yoo-Joon’s mind became filled with anger.

‘Suh Hyun-Woo didn’t deserve this. He shouldn’t have died like this.

Why did this have to happen to him?’

“How could you leave like this...” Kang Joo-Han muttered.

Even on the verge of debut, Suh Hyun-Woo had relentlessly practiced singing and dancing despite the setbacks. The anger and grief were unbearable. He hadn’t done anything wrong. He worked harder than anyone else.

“Hyun-Woo...”

‘Even in death, your story had to be tragic.’

Joo-Han’s head throbbed painfully. His vision blurred with tears, and his ears rang as if submerged in water. The sounds of weeping and Goh Yoo-Joon’s uncontrollable sobs filled the air.

‘Ah, I hate this.’

There was nothing Kang Joo-Han could do for Suh Hyun-Woo now. The song he had tirelessly composed for him were now just useless data in the face of death. He had been thinking, ‘No one else may help you fulfill your dreams, but I will.’ He had been cherishing his precious brother. But now, Joo-Han felt incredibly powerless at Hyun-Woo’s funeral.

***

A few days later, every sound in Kang Joo-Han’s house—the persistent ringing of his phone, the computer noises, the refrigerator hum—felt like an overwhelming cacophony to him. He turned off his phone, but there was nothing he could do about the computer and refrigerator noises, so he endured them with earplugs.

However, his own breathing became annoyingly loud with the earplugs in. He eventually tore the earplugs out and threw them across the room. It was a sign of how frayed his nerves were. Fed up, he shut down his computer, even though he rarely did that. But why did that matter? He wasn’t planning on working anyway.

He moved to the bedroom with the computer off, away from the refrigerator, where he finally found a place of silence. It was dark and quiet.

Thankfully, he had no broadcasting schedules for the time being. While Kang Joo-Han could freely mourn here, Goh Yoo-Joon and Lee Jin-Sung had to continue their schedules without a moment to grieve.

‘Both of them seemed out of their minds. I’m worried about them.’

Though he was the one who had cried the most at the funeral, he knew Goh Yoo-Joon and Lee Jin-Sung were struggling just as much.

Kang Joo-Han buried his swollen, sore eyes into the blanket. “Ha...”

Right now, he wished he could bring Suh Hyun-Woo in front of him and reassure him that his death was just a lie. But bringing Suh Hyun-Woo before him, even talking to him on the phone, was now impossible.

Memories of Suh Hyun-Woo flashed before his eyes like a lantern slide. On the day they first met, Suh Hyun-Woo had been much better at dancing and singing even though he was younger and smaller than young Joo-Han. He had been so popular among the trainees that he casually spoke informally to Kang Joo-Han and tried to teach him, making Kang Joo-Han jealous for a while.

He remembered how Suh Hyun-Woo cried when scolded by senior trainees and staff, and how he whined secretly to Joo-Han, wanting to hang out with friends after school instead of practicing.

Suh Hyun-Woo also openly complained about how Allure members debuted earlier than him despite having lower monthly evaluation scores than him. It was only because they were older than Suh Hyun-Woo. However, his sulking was adorable to Kang Joo-Han back then.

Every time their debut was delayed and their groups disbanded, they shared their struggles and comforted each other. Over time, Suh Hyun-Woo became as precious to Kang Joo-Han as family. Even though they had grown apart and it became difficult to hear from Suh Hyun-Woo, Joo-Han’s feelings for him never changed.

‘I was willing to do anything for you.’

Kang Joo-Han couldn’t let go of the dreams Suh Hyun-Woo had given up on, and he was determined to make them come true. But it was too late.

“What should I do for you...? How can I bring you back to life and have you stand before me again?”

The longing was unbearable.

“I should have met you more often, without hesitation. I should have called you more. I should have visited you like Yoo-Joon did. If the song was meant for you, I should have given it to you sooner...”

He wanted to meet Suh Hyun-Woo, have a drink together, give him the song, and see his bewildered expression as he forced it on Suh Hyun-Woo, just to hear him say, ‘Thanks, Hyung.’

There was no way to meet him anymore.

Just then, the doorbell rang at Kang Joo-Han’s house. When he ignored it, someone began punching in the door lock code and entered, calling out for him.

Kang Joo-Han shifted under the covers and pulled the blanket over his head. He didn’t need to see who it was to know.

“There you are, hyung.”

It was Goh Yoo-Joon. He stood staring at the unmoving lump under the blanket, knowing it had to be Kang Joo-Han. He wasn’t coming out, likely because he didn’t want Goh Yoo-Joon to see his swollen, tear-streaked face.

“Hyung, I finished my schedule and came here because I was worried about you, and you won’t even look at me?”

“...”

“I’m really sad right now too.”

“Then go home. Why did you come here?”

The blanket slowly slipped down. Kang Joo-Han looked pale and exhausted. He glared at Goh Yoo-Joon. Unfortunately, Goh Yoo-Joon didn’t look any better. He must have cried a lot at home before coming here.

𝑓𝓇𝘦ℯ𝘸𝘦𝑏𝓃𝑜𝘷ℯ𝑙.𝑐𝑜𝓂

‘Both Yoo-Joon and Hyun-Woo are too kind-hearted.’

Despite his own pain, Goh Yoo-Joon had come all the way here because he was worried about his friend.

“Did you come here just to cry? If so, go back. I can’t handle this right now.”

He truly wasn’t in the state to talk to anyone, not even Goh Yoo-Joon. But at that moment, Goh Yoo-Joon’s expression changed. “Hyung...”

He couldn’t even bring himself to enter the room. Instead, he dropped to the floor.

“I couldn’t bear it alone anymore, so I came here.”

He couldn’t endure the grief alone any longer. He felt like he was going to lose his mind if he stayed alone, so he came here on impulse. He didn’t expect Kang Joo-Han to comfort him, but he thought maybe sharing the grief would help.

“...”

Finally, Kang Joo-Han got out of bed and approached Goh Yoo-Joon.

“Hyung, I actually went to see Suh Hyun-Woo’s grave yesterday.”

“...”

“If I knew this would happen, I would have forced him to meet up with me when he was alive.”

Tears streamed down Goh Yoo-Joon’s face. It had been so long since Kang Joo-Han had seen him cry, and his heart ached seeing him sob so desperately.

“Hyung, I feel like this is all our fault.”

Objectively, they hadn’t done anything wrong. But they couldn’t shake the feeling that they had failed Suh Hyun-Woo in some way. That he couldn’t achieve his dreams, that he lived with trauma his whole life, the estrangement, and his death... It all felt like their fault.

A flood of negative emotions overwhelmed them, making it impossible to think straight.

For the teenage Goh Yoo-Joon, Suh Hyun-Woo had been more than just a friend. He was like family.

After sobbing for a long time, Goh Yoo-Joon finally spoke. “If I could, I’d go back to the past.”

Back to when they were trainees together. If he could, he would have shielded Suh Hyun-Woo from any harm, no matter the cost. If he could go back, he’d make sure they realized their dream with Elated.

“I don’t know what to do.”

At that moment, a strange light, like moonlight, faintly appeared from an unknown source. With blackout curtains drawn, no light should have come in.

Kang Joo-Han and Goh Yoo-Joon looked up. It wasn’t the light of the moon. Amid the gloomy dawn, words began to float in the air as the two, overwhelmed by sadness, were enveloped in their grief.