Chapter 652

In life, there are moments when one’s heart beats so fiercely it feels like it might burst. It could be from surprise, fear, excitement, or an overwhelming mix of emotions.

At that moment, that was what Riana was experiencing.

Fear gripped her, but it wasn’t just fear. It was a tangled web of emotions, both overwhelming and frightening, causing her heart to beat so fast it felt like it might explode.

Sometimes, one’s heartbeat isn’t just felt in the chest, but echoes in the ears as well.

For Riana, this was one of those moments.

Overwhelmed, Riana couldn’t bring herself to meet the eyes of a friend she hadn’t seen in so long. She lowered her gaze, unsure of what words might spill out in her fear.

There was a time when they had promised to defeat the Demon King together. She felt deeply grateful for that shared determination. But back then, they had been too young and weak to take on such a monumental enemy. The name “Demon King” was far too overwhelming for them to truly embrace it as their adversary.

They used to laugh at themselves and each other for daring to dream of revenge. But when did that name stop feeling so burdensome?

Somewhere along the way, their resolve for vengeance lost its direction. Riana, who once sought to kill the Demon King, had ended up becoming his confidant—one of his most trusted allies.

If she had to put a label on it, she had become one of those known as the Four Demon Lords.

Explaining all the countless events that had transpired since that day would take several nights. Yet, the conversation had to begin somewhere, if only to share the words one needed to say.

Following Riana’s hesitant greeting, Cliffman simply looked at her in silence.

He had never been much of a talker, not just with Riana, but with everyone. Cliffman had always been the listener, and when he did speak, his responses were either brief or, on rare occasions, a rambling stream of thoughts. He was terribly inarticulate.

He remained silent, just like before, but Riana couldn’t help noticing that something about him had changed. In the past, Cliffman kept quiet because he couldn’t find the right words. This time, it wasn’t that he was at a loss for words; he was carefully choosing them.

It wasn’t that he didn’t know what to say. He was just trying to figure out where to begin.

Time moved on, and people changed.

Just as Riana had changed, so had Cliffman.

He finally opened his mouth.

“You came to see someone like me at last.”

The once shy boy had grown into a cynical man.

***

The weight of that single sentence hit Riana so hard that it made her head spin.

Those few words contained all the thoughts, self-doubt, and disillusionment Cliffman had been carrying.

“What do you mean... someone like you?” Riana asked, tears beginning to well up in her eyes as she looked up at Cliffman.

“I’m weak,” he replied.

“...”

“Isn’t that why you left me behind?” he continued, his voice tinged with hurt.

Her heart sank. It wasn’t an insult to her, but to himself.

“Someone like me, who had only just begun to use Mana Reinforcement, would have been useless to bring along,” he confessed. “It was only natural not to.”

Riana couldn’t let Cliffman continue to put himself down.

“No, no... I...”

“If not, then what?” Cliffman asked, his voice gentle but insistent.

“Huh...?”

“Was there another reason?”

Riana’s heart ached as she bit her lip, struggling to find the right words. “I... If you came with me, you’d get hurt. No, you’d die... I didn’t want you to suffer because of my stubbornness.”

“So you’re saying that if I had gone with you, I would have only ended up hurt or dead, without being able to help you at all.”

“...”

It was just a different way of saying that even if he had been by her side, he would have been useless anyway, wasn’t it?

Would anything have changed if Cliffman had been there? No, it wouldn’t have. In fact, he would have been a burden.

‘I didn’t bring you along because I didn’t want you to get hurt.’

‘I didn’t bring you with me because having you there would probably only have negative results.’

They were two different ways of expressing the same thing.

Riana had expressed the first sentiment, but Cliffman understood it in the second way. And the fact that the second statement was the truth did not change.

But wasn’t that too harsh of an interpretation? Wasn’t the intention what mattered? Wasn’t it too hurtful for an action taken out of concern for him to be seen as an action taken out of disregard?

Unfortunately, it seemed Riana’s intentions didn’t matter.

‘I was abandoned because I was deemed useless. I was too weak to keep up.’

That was how Cliffman saw it.

He had been thinking that way ever since the day the Gate Incident broke out.

“Riana, I’m not upset, and I don’t blame you for what you did. You had to make that choice, and it was the right one. I wouldn’t have been any help, certainly.”

“...”

“And things wouldn’t be much different now.”

Cliffman, who once struggled to find the right words, could now articulate his thoughts with a chilling clarity.

But all his words were blanketed in sorrow.

There was no resentment towards Riana. Instead, he felt disillusioned with his own weakness. It was a self-assessment that bordered on self-hatred.

Cliffman was simply stating the facts, and he listed them without any trace of bitterness towards Riana.

All his resentment and disillusionment were aimed at himself.

If he had been strong enough to be of help, Riana would have turned to him.

He resented his own weakness. He was disillusioned with himself.

Cliffman understood the pain Ludwig had felt after losing an arm. It was that empathy that kept him by Ludwig’s side.

Riana had been terrified. She’d feared Cliffman might curse her, resent her, or blame her for the betrayal he felt. Those thoughts had haunted her all this while. However, Riana was being confronted with something she hadn’t anticipated.

Cliffman held no resentment. Not towards her. Not towards the Demon King. Not towards anyone.

“Thank you once again.”

“...”

“For taking the time to visit someone like me.”

His words were filled with self-loathing.

Riana found Cliffman’s demeanor even more unsettling.

As she watched him crumble, Riana clenched her teeth and bowed her head.

“I... I was wrong. I... I’m sorry...”

When Riana finally broke down in tears, Cliffman just stared at her, his face set in stone.

“No, Riana—”

“No, it’s... It’s all... it’s all my fault. I... I...”

“You did nothing wrong.”

Riana finally understood that the hardest thing to bear was the realization that the person who should have resented you did not.

***

Cliffman wasn’t angry, nor did he feel betrayed. He’d accepted it as a matter of course. He had not been brought along because he couldn’t be of any help. It was his fault for being useless. He was just still too weak.

That was all he thought.

Cliffman waited patiently in front of Riana until her tears subsided. He simply watched her cry with the same expression as before.

“If you’ve calmed down, shall we talk?” he finally said.

“...”

He didn’t hold any resentment toward her, but he wasn’t particularly kind either. He didn’t hug her or pat her back as she cried. He hadn’t been the type to do that before, and this time, it seemed the thought didn’t even cross his mind.

When he said that she had done nothing wrong, it had only deepened her guilt.

Riana found Cliffman unfamiliar.

He had changed in ways she hadn’t expected.

Once Riana’s tears subsided, Cliffman began asking her questions.

Since he truly held no resentment, his words came easily.

In the end, only the one who had erred felt uneasy.

Riana couldn’t help but watch Cliffman’s reactions closely as he simply asked her for the information he wanted to know.

“Your father’s death... It wasn’t because of the Demon King, was it?”

“That’s right.”

“Then, was it the Empire?”

Riana kept silent.

“I see.”

When Riana vanished with the Demon King without a word, Cliffman had developed a hunch about what had transpired. There could be no other explanation for Riana, who had labeled the Demon King as her sworn enemy, to suddenly choose to rescue him and disappear.

“I... actually thought I would die that day,” Riana said. “It was a reckless move, even though I was with Harriet. Harriet was ready for that, too. But you... I didn’t want to involve you.”

Because of a series of overlapping circumstances, Reinhart managed to escape the Temple, but Riana had essentially walked into a death trap—a place where she was certain she would meet her end. Therefore, she could not bring Cliffman along with her.

It was true that she’d conspired with Harriet but left Cliffman behind. Harriet could be of help; Cliffman couldn’t. But that was just the truth.

“I understand,” he said, but Riana could hear the resignation in his voice, and it made her grit her teeth.

“No... You don’t understand at all,” she replied, her frustration bubbling over.

“I fully understand that I was of no use,” he insisted.

“I hated the thought of you dying because of me more than I feared dying myself!” she exclaimed, her voice trembling with emotion.

He fell silent, unable to respond.

Riana’s face was contorted with anguish.

Cliffman silently observed Riana after her outburst.

“It wasn’t because you were useless, or because you were weak...”

Tears began to fill Riana’s eyes once more.

“It was because you were precious to me...”

Cliffman’s eyes widened at Riana’s heartfelt confession.

“Because you mattered to me. Because I couldn’t bear the thought of losing you... That’s why... That’s why it happened. It isn’t what you thought. I didn’t mean that. I’m sorry. I’m sorry for what I did. I’m sorry for being wrong. I’m sorry for being a jerk and leaving you behind. But...”

“...”

“But please, it wasn’t because you were meaningless. It wasn’t because you were useless. It wasn’t because you were useless, or because you were weak. It wasn’t like that... Please, believe me. That’s the truth.”

It was true that she’d left him behind, but the reason why she’d left him behind... In the end, it came down to that.

Riana’s words, spoken through a veil of tears and with a look of utter despair, felt more like a plea than a confession.

“Just... Just slap me across the face. Call me a bitch. Ask me why I had forsaken you. Call me a traitor... That would be better... That would make me feel better...”

Riana felt like she was suffocating under the weight of her own guilt. Yet, as she looked at Cliffman, she wished he would hate her instead.

It’s always easier to place the blame on someone else. When the only fault one can find is within, that sentiment eats away at you.

Those who go through life blaming others can at least keep going. But if one believes everything is their fault, they will slowly wither away from inside.

Riana found it more painful to see this version of Cliffman, who had grown resigned and self-deprecating, than to endure his anger.

If anyone else was living that way, she wouldn’t have cared. But to Riana, Cliffman wasn’t just anyone.

As she cried, Cliffman stared blankly up at the sky.

They were in the forest. Sunlight filtered through the leaves.

“You were precious to me, too,” he said softly.

“...”

“Yet I couldn’t help someone so dear to me.”

“...”

“I never wanted to think badly of you. I always believed that there was a reason for everything—a reason for the silence, a reason for being left behind, a reason for the Gate Incident. I held onto the idea that every action had its own justification. I didn’t want to resent you,” he confessed, sharing thoughts he’d kept to himself for so long.

Out of countless options open to him, he had chosen just one.

He had refused to choose resentment when it came to Riana.

“That was the only way to avoid resenting you,” he explained.

Riana was precious to him, and so he tried to see her actions as justified. He wondered why she hadn’t taken him with her, why she had kept him in the dark.

To maintain this perspective, he had been forced to look inward for answers.

If only he had been stronger. If only he had been more dependable. If only he had been someone Riana could turn to, someone she could confide in completely. Then everything would have been alright. Riana hadn’t done anything wrong.

To avoid resenting her, Cliffman had drowned himself in self-loathing.

As she watched Cliffman spiral into this pitiful self-admission, Riana wiped her tears away with determination.

“Honestly...”

Her eyes, red from crying, met Cliffman’s.

“You’re still such a fool...” she said.

He could have simply resolved it all by simply blaming Riana. It would have been easier to conclude that she had lost her mind after choosing to follow the Demon King and resent her for her silence.

But choosing to rationalize the other person’s actions and blaming oneself instead—what else could that be but foolishness?

Riana grabbed Cliffman’s hand.

She squeezed it so tightly it seemed like it might break, yet to Cliffman, her grip felt weak.

Despite her powerful supernatural abilities, she still lacked physical strength.

They had changed.

Riana had changed, and Cliffman had changed.

But some things remained the same.

Even after everything they had been through, the fact that they still cherished each other hadn’t changed.

“There are good things about being a fool,” Cliffman said softly.

“Like what...?” Riana asked.

“Like a fool—I know I’m no use and still so weak... Yet I blurted out something that I knew would not have changed a thing. I did the foolish thing and said, ‘I want to meet you.’”

Cliffman closed his other hand over Riana’s.

“And because of that... I was able to see you again.”

Riana had no real reason to meet with him, and Cliffman was well aware of that. Yet, he couldn’t help but voice his desire to see her, even if it sounded absurd.

Deep down, he knew that getting to meet her was unlikely, and that she had no obligation to come. But still, he clung to the hope that, against all odds, there might be a one-in-a-million chance she’d appear.

In the end, she had agreed to his unusual request, which was how they found themselves face to face once more.

Despite how everything had fallen apart, they realized they held no resentment toward each other.

One was full of self-deprecation, while the other felt a pang of guilt.

Sometimes, foolishness doesn’t necessarily only lead to bad outcomes.

“Really... You’ve really...”

Riana’s lips quivered slightly.

“You’ve gotten so... cheesy with age...”

Saying it made her feel like she might gag. Riana shivered, as if she could barely contain herself.

Then, unexpectedly, she laughed—a laugh filled with pure joy.

It was the first time she had laughed in three years.

***

“...”

“...”

My eyes locked with Thick-Skull’s.

“I guess it went well... right?” she asked hesitantly.

“It went so well, it’s making me nauseous,” I replied.

“Yeah... I get you...”

‘Cliffman... That guy had gotten really cheesy. He wasn’t like that when I observed him in cat form. Or maybe he just acted that way around Riana?’

I hadn’t meant to eavesdrop at first. Harriet and I were watching from a distance, just in case something happened, before it turned into eavesdropping.

We weren’t trying to spy. We just wanted to be ready to step in if Cliffman did anything unpredictable.

But in the end, it turned into spying.

Watching Riana cry like that was hard, and hearing Cliffman say that much was unexpected.

But eavesdropping on a conversation like that was a lot better than getting caught up in something like a fight between them.

Nonetheless, Harriet and I, using magic to overhear their conversation, both felt a little queasy.

“But it’s a relief... such a relief,” Harriet said.

She was right. It

was

a huge relief.

So what if Cliffman was cheesy? The important thing was that nothing bad happened.

At first, it seemed like things were going off track, but in the end, Cliffman’s thoughts had only developed in such a way because Riana meant so much to him.

He had asked to see Riana, and was grateful that she had actually showed up.

Riana felt touched, though it saddened her that Cliffman was so hard on himself instead of blaming her.

In the end, Cliffman valued Riana more than she had realized.

When observing him in my cat form, he had been so quiet that I couldn’t discern his thoughts.

Eventually, though, he revealed his true feelings to Riana.

“Honestly, my heart was pounding a bit...” Harriet said, her face flushed and tear-streaked, as she watched Riana and Cliffman conversing comfortably.

‘Her heart was pounding?’

“Do you like that kind of thing?”

“Huh?”

‘Do you enjoy cheesy stuff?’

“What? Do you want me to say that to you as well?” I asked.

At my suggestion, Harriet’s brow furrowed, and her mouth fell open slightly.

“I’ve never tried anything like that, but if you want, I can give it a shot.”

Seeing my expression, which probably hinted at some foolish idea, Harriet shot me a glare sharp enough to cut through steel.

“Don’t you dare.”

Honestly, though, coming up with cheesy lines on the spot is tougher than it seems.

‘What can I possibly say?’

“Meeting you was the greatest fortune of my life,” I said.

That was the best I could come up with.

Harriet tilted her head, not entirely convinced by my sudden statement.

“But that’s just a fact, isn’t it?” she asked.

“Hm???”

“Am I wrong?”

That was hardly what I’d intended to convey. The words had slipped out so quickly, I found myself at a loss for a response.

“Uh, no... yeah, you’re right...” I stammered.

“Hmph...”

I suppose I couldn’t refute the assertion that it was indeed the greatest fortune.

“But doesn’t it feel a bit... off to admit that about yourself?” I asked, hesitating.

Thick-Skull stepped closer, linking her arm with mine. She glanced up, a shy smile playing on her lips.

“Our lovely little kitty is happy to have an owner like me, right?” she said.

‘No, no! Hold on a second! Why are you better at this than I am?’

“I... I was wrong,” I stammered. “I’m sorry...”

Cheesy or not, my heart nearly stopped.

“See, that’s what you get for messing around.”